What. The. Fuck.

Do you ever sometimes notice something about yourself, and you're all like...

What.  The.  Fuck.  Is.  Happening?!

And then you do the math in your head and realize AGE is what's happening.

You are approaching OLD.

I do.

About once a week these days.

This week I noticed the two horizontal lines on my forehead that don't go away despite my best efforts to relax my face.

I also noticed 37 gray hairs. 

I plucked 17 of them before my ADD got the better of me and I lost focus.

Some things about aging I like. 

SOME.

Most I do not.

I do not like:

-gray hair
-achy joints
-that I have to stop and wait for my hips to adjust when rising from an extended sitting period
-wrinkles
-age spots
-decreased brain plasticity
-mammograms
-worrying about retirement plans
-fucking EVERYTHING

Which brings me to what I DO like about aging....

I'm sorry, what was I talking about?

I'm so old I can't remember.