Pee Problems.

Took my sister's youngest to the water park recently. 

The day began with my sister dropping her two youngest off on my porch with a few bags full of swim stuff hollering behind her as she bolted like the devil for her car walked calmly back to her vehicle, "Have fun!"

After feeding them both lunch, I went to put the swimsuit on the 2 year old when it occurred to me that she wears diapers.

Having spilled many a beer on my own lap I am familiar at this point with the laws of absorption, therefore I knew I couldn't put her swimsuit OVER her diaper, but I figured there must be some genius somewhere who'd created a solution.

Sure enough.

Enter: the Swim Diaper.

A diaper with apparently SUPER diaper powers.

To absorb PEE.

Buuuut....my sister didn't have one of those. 

Don't worry, she said when I called her--swim bottoms in one hand, wriggling half naked baby in the other--to ask, "WHERE ARE THE SWIM DIAPERS?!"

"Oh," she says.  "You can buy them at the park for $3."

WTF.

I am not buying a glorified wad of cotton to shove in between a toddlers legs so as to absorb PEE at a WATER PARK for $3.

That's highway robbery y'all.

We're going to a WATER park...where she'll be in a POOL OF WATER*.

So I put the swim bottoms on sans ANYTHING and extracted a promise from her to NOT pee in my car EN ROUTE to the waterpark.

I know. 

Sometimes I also like to hold scissors and run at the same time too.

I'm kind of a rebel like that.

 None the less, there I was at the water park with said child tolerating the squealing enjoying the day when I hear....

"I go pee."

I turn around, "What?"

She repeats, "I go pee," this time pointing helpfully at the puddle by her feet.

"I go pee," she says helpfully pointing.

*OH SHUT UP.  I know y'all done peed in the shower/bath/pool/waterpark before do don't go JUDGING me JudgyMcJudgerstons.