Wednesday, June 25, 2014

Man Eating Vaginas, Magical Penises & Cat Murderers: NSFW

In case you live in a cave or are blind you missed the most awesome vagina story EVER this week.

Some moron an American exchange student got trapped in a giant vagina whilst touring Germany.

Need a visual?

ALLOW ME....


What's that, you say?

Hard to tell that this otherwise unassuming young man is trapped in a giant vagina sculpture? 

ALLOW ME....

The offending vagina:


Confused?

So was he.  Apparently.  Which is why he though he could crawl all up in there and find the Holy Land.

So am I, frankly.

I mean, what the hell kind of vagina is that?

Does YOUR vagina look like that?

ME NEITHER.

Has the artist who created this sculpture ever actually SEEN a human female vagina?

*sigh* I DIGRESS.

The REAL story here is what happened after I became obsessed with vaginas over the weekend.

Frankly, this whole "GIANT VAGINA TRAPS MAN!!!!" sensation that swept the internet TOTALLY kept me from doing any real work whatsoever.

Damn those giant man trapping vaginas.

(FYI: the whole purpose of this particular blog entry is to use the word "VAGINA" as much as is possible in one blog post...YOU'RE WELCOME)

So, naturally, I spent an inordinate amount of time this week googling vaginas.

Didn't you?

You would be surprised at how many people have done strange things to their nether regions and then taken pictures of them which they posted on the internets.

Or, maybe you wouldn't--WHO AM I TO JUDGE.

Either way, I strongly suggest you take moment to google, "GIANT MAN TRAPPING VAGINA"

I found the following...


I know.

I hardly know where to begin. 

Let's begin with magical penises, shall we?  THIS picture is of Huang Jianjun, of Guangzhou Guangdong Province, China *insert boring picture here*:



He apparently has a very special penis which traps ghosts. Or at least so he said to a woman who withheld her nether regions on account of how they are haunted.  

Haunted vagina INDEED...Clever gal.

Here's a picture of a man posing with dead "pussy's" for no real reason except that when you google "giant man eating vagina" you risk getting pictures of cats as a metaphor for vaginas....and sadist cat murderers, apparently. 


 I could go on for DAYS people.

DAYS.

*sigh*

God Bless the internet.


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